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Le coach, un marchand de bonheur ?
Posted on 9 October, 2015 at 15:31 |
Une recherche menée en 2007 par deux
disciples de Martin Seligman, père de la psychologie positive, a conclu que
l’aspiration prioritaire des dix mille personnes interrogées dans quarante huit
pays consiste avant tout à être heureux, loin devant la quête du sens de sa
vie, l’existence du paradis ou l’obtention de la richesse. J’ignore si mes client-e-s font
partie de l’échantillon consulté, mais j’émets l’hypothèse que, si je leur
posais la question, la réponse irait dans la même direction. Ce qui n’est guère
surprenant : si les personnes que j’accompagne ont recours à mes services,
c’est prioritairement pour mieux vivre une situation professionnelle qui, doux
euphémisme, ne contribue en tout cas pas à leur bonheur, quand elle n’est pas
carrément source de stress voire de souffrance. En réponse à ce constat, d’autres
études en lien à la psychologie positive aboutissent à une liste de conseils
qui se basent sur ce que font les gens qui sont heureux comme, par exemple,
s’entourer de gens heureux, agir pour être heureux, faire don de soi ou être
optimiste. Mon intuition et ma déontologie me disent que non, mais cela ne suffit pas à me
rendre heureux. Je décide donc de trouver ma félicité ailleurs. Dans son ouvrage Du bonheur. Un voyage philosophique (Fayard,
2013), le philosophe des religions Frédéric Lenoir nous invite à découvrir ce
que ce concept signifie aux yeux des différents sages dans l’Histoire, des
anciens Grecs aux penseurs contemporains. En simplifiant beaucoup, toutes les
écoles se rejoignent sur deux points : il n’y a pas de bonheur sans désir et
on ne peut être heureux sans une nécessaire négociation entre nos désirs et
notre raison, en fonction surtout de notre réalité contextuelle. Si je fais le lien avec les
accompagnements menés par mes soins jusqu’à ce jour, je constate que, au
démarrage du moins, il y a effectivement un désir et il est dans la plupart des
cas de changer le contexte ou,
parfois, de contexte. C’est une
attitude compréhensible et à prendre en compte, surtout lorsqu’il s’agit de situations
qui sont sources de souffrances. Or, toujours selon l’auteur
français, toutes les études sociologiques sur le bonheur de ces trente
dernières années tendent à montrer que seuls 10% des aptitudes au bonheur
relève des circonstances extérieures, alors que 50% dépendent de la sensibilité
de l’individu et 40% de sa capacité à fournir des efforts personnels. En – très
– gros : j’ai plus de chance d’être heureux si je mets mon énergie à
travailler sur ma relation à moi-même et à la situation professionnelle
problématique que si je m’efforce à vouloir changer le fonctionnement de mon
entreprise ou de mon patron – même si la responsabilité de ces derniers est
engagée et n’est donc pas à minimiser. Il s’agit par conséquent, pour le
coach, d’aider la personne accompagnée à glisser progressivement d’une logique
d’adaptation du contexte à ses désirs à celle d’une réflexion sur ce qui se
cache derrière ces mêmes désirs – notamment ceux qui débouchent sur des
objectifs trop élevés et des attentes irréalistes ou ceux qui sont restés
lettre morte – et qui participe au
malheur et au bonheur au travail. Et ce chemin-là ne se
laisse ni vendre « en kit » ni définir à l’avance : il est à
construire. Il s’agit là d’un acte éminemment créateur et créatif qui part de
l’intérieur de la personne elle-même et qui s’oppose à toute tyrannie, y
compris celle, très actuelle, du bonheur : ce dernier ne se trouve-t-il d’ailleurs
pas plus dans les détours du voyage qu’arrivé à destination ? Tiré
de Psychologies
Magazine, juin 2015, pages 72 à 75. Cet article est une reprise légèrement augmentée d'un texte paru à l'origine sous la forme du "Billet du coach" sur le site de Coaching-Services (http://www.coaching-services.ch/newsletter/le-coach-un-marchand-de-bonheur) |
Categories: Fondements du coaching
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